The conclusion of a three-part series; read Part One or Part Two.

It was during the 1980s that I started to really understand my faith. While not Catholic, I started to practice Lenten sacrifices more and more. I had followed the "no meat on Fridays" routine since high school, but that expanded to no alcohol during Lent in college, and finally, giving up "sex" during Lent 1984. Since I was not in a relationship, the only sex to give up was masturbation. I had my last masturbation session on Mardi Gras Tuesday and went a whole week without masturbating, but I caved in the following Wednesday. Angry at my lack of discipline, I resolved to make it through seven weeks, and amazingly, I did. I resisted masturbating until the week after Easter 1984, the equivalent of a Lenten season. I didn't even have a wet-dream during that period. I continued to repeat the yearly sacrifice right through to 1995. Each year, though, I discovered that it was difficult to start the first week or two, very easy to maintain during the middle weeks, but by the last two weeks, I could hardly think of anything other than masturbating the day after Easter. It became such an obsession, I realized the sacrifice was almost self-defeating. I had given up the act of sex but became more absorbed by thoughts of sex. Eventually, I realized this was not a worthy sacrifice (and probably not a healthy one for my prostate, either) — so while I still do not eat meat on Fridays and Wednesdays during Lent, and I abstain from alcohol during Lent, I now masturbate a few times during Lent — not as often as I normally would, but not abstaining and obsessing for 7 weeks!

I was fortunate to get an opportunity to live abroad for several years and discovered my closest friends abroad and I were equally willing and uninhibited about our masturbation discussions. It seems the same hang-ups any U.S. male has are shared across the Atlantic — and probably around the world, as JackinWorld and JackInsider have astutely discovered. I also had the opportunity to become involved with a youth group during my time abroad, which had many difficult challenges. One challenge was counseling a 14-year-old boy who could not wait until he turned 16 (the legal age of consent) so he could have sex every day with girls. How do you explain that sex is not an easy or trivial thing, usually because more than the physical is involved? I explained to the best of my abilities that with sex come emotions that he may not be willing or ready to handle. I then broached the topic of masturbation as an alternative. He sheepishly admitted that, yes, he did masturbate. I admitted that even in my 30s I still masturbated, especially since I was still single and had gone through the occasional traumas serious relationships can bring. I was unaware of the firestorm brewing in the U.S. regarding Dr. Joycelyn Elders, but I was giving the same advice she had. My confession relaxed my young friend. I was stunned to discover he masturbated very frequently — 4 or 5 times a day, several days a week. He even ate his semen. My teenage habits paled in comparison to his 20-25 orgasms a week. I guess a lot had changed in 20 years. Thanks to JackinWorld, I realize my friend is just like many current teenagers and young adults. We have kept in touch since my return to the U.S., and now that he is in University, I think he finally understands the discussions we had those afternoons several years ago.

During the 1990s, my masturbation sessions settled into a comfortable routine, which lasted until recently. I usually masturbate 5 times a week, always in the morning when I wake up, typically starting in bed, but always ejaculating in the bathroom for easy cleanup (right into the toilet!). I could never grow accustomed to ejaculating onto my stomach; it was just too much of a hassle to clean up, especially after hair started growing there. I still rarely use a lubricant, unless I am very horny. I admit that I still have a few masturbation hangups: I never masturbate when I am on vacation, I still don't masturbate on Sundays, I still can't bring myself to masturbate in my mother's new home, even though current circumstances have me there several days a week, which has really cut down on my masturbation frequency. Over the last year, I've found the only opportunity I have to masturbate is on weekends. This means I am usually very busy on Saturdays, masturbating 2 or 3 times with incredibly intense orgasms. I would still like to have a close friend with whom I can share my masturbation thoughts and sessions on a regular basis, but that friendship has yet to develop. I find it reassuring to know that many guys out there also have the same wish, and that it is a normal "male-bonding" desire. Thanks to JackinWorld and JackInsider I can feel comfortable knowing my masturbation habits and desires are shared by many, and that whatever we do, it is "normal."

Sorry this has run on so long. I guess nearly 30 years of masturbation cannot be summarized in just a few sentences. Here's hoping the next 30 years will have as much to discuss! Thank you JackInsider, for allowing me to write down some of my favorite life stories at long last, especially the story of Bert and Lee. And yes, I did finally did figure out what that drop was which appeared on the tip of my penis when I was 12 1/2.


Go to the JackinWorld Random Biography Picker

Go to the JackinWorld Biographies Index