I remember playing "doctor" with a neighbor girl as early as age 5. This excited me a great deal, and it felt good for her (or me) to rub my erection. (I think I have always had erections). But I never got to an orgasm from it.
When I was 7 or 8 a neighbor boy ("Friend 1") wondered what a girl looked like "down there," and I described it as best I could. I remember scratching a drawing in the dirt. He then asked if I looked like he did. I said I supposed so. After going through "I'll show you mine if you'll show me yours," we compared genitals. This led to a lot of continuing sexual play over the next few years, some of it involving just the two of us, and some with the girl. We would rub each other, sword-fight with our erections, etc. It always felt good, but I never had an orgasm (I don't think he did, either), and it never led to prolonged stroking like I used after puberty. I don't think he knew any more than I did.
Friend 1 moved to the next town after the 5th grade, and I saw him a lot less often. The spring after my 12th birthday, he came to visit, and we went up to my room. After a little while he closed the door and said, "Do this with me." He dropped his pants, lay down on my bed, and started stroking. I did too. He said, "Doesn't it feel great?" I thought it felt okay, but not great. Friend 1 was 10 months older than I, and he hit puberty at an earlier age than I did. His erection seemed enormous, and he had a good bit of hair. So far I had none. He explained that it really felt good to him, and the longer you did it, the better it felt, until the end, when you felt something like nothing else in the world. I stroked along as he went faster and faster. At the end he grabbed a tissue and squirted into it. I didn't get a lot out of the experience, but I did learn a lot. He told me I just needed to be a little older, that I should keep trying. I did every month or so.
I think this was an excellent introduction of masturbation. While I didn't experience what he did, he told me what he was feeling, and I learned about ejaculation, so that when it happened to me, I wasn't shocked or concerned about it. Friend 1 used a thumb-and-two-finger grip, which I used for years. We did this a couple more times over the next year. Shortly after my 13th birthday I developed pubic hair, but I still couldn't orgasm. Finally, about a month after my 14th birthday, I had my first orgasm. The ejaculate wasn't much, and it was watery, not white, but I had gotten there. And it felt pretty good. It would feel a lot better a few months later when my body matured more. I settled into a morning-and-night pattern until I got to college.
When I first started masturbating a felt a lot of guilt after each session. This lessened as I got older. The next time I spent the night at Friend 1's I said, "I can do it now." He said, "I don't do it anymore — my dad told me it would give me a hernia." So much for sex education in the first half of the 1950s!
Over the next year I had, one at a time, two more masturbation partners. I was at Friend 2's house (he was a year behind me in school), and he said he wanted to show me something in the basement. After we were down there awhile he made the hand motion and said, "Do you do this?" I nodded yes, and he said, "Want to do it with me?" I thought why not, and said okay. We unzipped together. We were both erect as soon as we pulled them out. We had a little sword-play and then started stroking. We did this a half-dozen times over a couple of months.
Then I met Friend 3, another guy in the same grade. I instigated this. I had a shoebox of drawings, photos from National Geographic, etc., that I used as visual aids, and I showed them to him. I told him that they had made me erect. He admitted that they were sexy and that he was erect as well. He took out his penis and held it in his right hand, slowly moving his foreskin over the glans and back. His friend was at his immediate right, staring at him. Really weird. I wonder if he had lost a bet?
When I got to college I had considerably less privacy. I always had one or two roommates, and the showers and bathrooms were communal. I adjusted by masturbating during the times when my roommate was in class or had gone home for the weekend. I never saw my roommates masturbating, and I don't think they ever saw me, and I cannot recall ever talking about it with them.
When I joined the Army, that was worse than college. For the first couple of weeks, like most guys, I was too emotionally distressed to even get an erection. But that didn't last long. Again, there were communal showers and toilets, this time with no partitions. I had to develop techniques for stroking under the covers with no sound and no visible motion. When I got to Germany it was better, as at least the bathrooms had lockable stalls. I still used some of the under-the-covers techniques, though, and I occasionally masturbated in the shower when I felt safe. There wasn't much discussion of masturbation in this environment, but I am sure it was in Germany when I first heard the joke that "It's my [penis] and my soap, and I'll wash it as fast as I want to."
I do remember talking on several occasions to one close friend about masturbation (he remains a close friend to this day). We once talked of the need to masturbate before a long field exercise, because after about 10 days with no orgasm, I (and he) would have a "wet dream," and that's messy in a sleeping bag. I also once told him, mostly to see his reaction, about masturbating with other guys when I was a young teen. He claimed to have never done anything like that. I also told him about using baby oil as a lube, and that in a pinch, soap would do. [Note: JackinWorld does not recommend using soap as a lube; please see JackinSafety. -Ed.] He was uncircumcised and had never used lubrication. One time I walked into the shower room and he was the only one there. He said, "Remember what you told me about using soap?" I said yes, and he said that he had just tried it and it was pretty good. Once on leave together we had just settled down for the night and he said, "I'll do you if you will do me." I couldn't believe it. But I turned him down. I hadn't done anything like that since I was 14 or 15. Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if I had accepted. It might have ruined what became a life-long friendship. I don't really remember how it came up or what was said, but I know another friend in Germany and I discussed masturbation enough for him to convince me that he didn't do it (he was Catholic).
Back in college, a couple of friends and I were talking, and one of them mentioned that he had learned about masturbation by humping the sheets at night. The other one said, "You too?" I experimented during this time with a pillow, a condom (we called them rubbers then), and lube. It was pretty good, but messy. One evening when we were both sort of drunk I recommended to a close friend that he try this. He asked if it really felt like making love to a girl, and I told him it was the closest I had found. I don't know if he tried it or not.
Before I got married I experimented a lot and learned that I liked anal stimulation. I have over the years occasionally used candles and other makeshift devices for anal stimulation during masturbation.
I got married relatively late, at age 32, and am still married. But I still masturbate. I like it a lot, and it is handy and quick when I need it to be. And I travel a good bit and stay faithful to the wife.
Over the last few decades a couple of close friends and I have discussed masturbation more openly, though still in private. I was talking on the phone to a friend who had been without a girlfriend for a while, and had started dating again. I told him I was glad, and I laughingly told him he wouldn't have to depend on his hand as much. He laughed at it. Another time I was talking to the guy who is my closest friend. He had said that he was glad I was his friend, that we could talk about anything. I said, "Well, there are still some taboos." He asked what. I said "Well, I can't ask you when was the last time you masturbated." He said, "Sure you can. Yesterday morning."
A few years back I was by myself in Toronto on business, and the hotel room's bathroom had a traditional bidet. If you don't know what one is, look it up on the Internet. (You got here, didn't you?) As soon as I saw it, I knew what I wanted to do. Back in the bedroom for the night, I turned up the heat so I would be comfortable nude, and I stripped. I went to the bidet and ran the water until it was hot. I got out my baby oil and put it close at hand. I adjusted the water until it was quite warm and hitting my anus pretty hard. I lubed up and went at it. I slowly turned up the hot water so it both increased in temperature and hit my anus harder. Before I ejaculated I had the water quite hot (but not hurting) and really pounding on my anus. It was a wonderful orgasm. Don't knock it if you haven't tried it!
I'm 61 now and enjoy masturbation as much as I ever have. I don't do it as much, but I wouldn't give it up for anything.
Do you find yourself masturbating more often during some seasons than others? Why?
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Bidet on business
Gender:
Male