My story is somewhat different because I did not ejaculate by hand until I was nearly 18. I was raised in an extremely sexually repressive home. My mother did not believe in sex for pleasure and rarely engaged in it. Sex was never discussed at our house, and neither my 3 older brothers nor I ever received any sex instruction at home.
As a child I was aware of sex but rarely engaged in any sex play, and I don't remember having erections before puberty. There were 7 boys in the neighborhood who were my age, and we played together, but sex play was never a part of it. Once when I walked to the store with one friend, he said, "Look what I dare to do," and pulled out his penis. I was very surprised that he would do this, because I had been taught never to expose myself in public. I was also surprised that his glans was so tiny compared to mine (even though I didn't know what it was for) — just a little bud on the end of his small shaft. Looking back on it, I suppose he was uncircumcised and that was all that was showing.
My brothers and I were all circumcised, while our father was not. We lived in a small house with one bathroom, so there were lots of opportunities to see each other naked. My father had a very thick penis and a large, hairy scrotum which hung very low. I was fascinated with the fact that he had a foreskin while we did not. I often pondered the difference, and couldn't decide whether he was deformed or we were! We boys all had a little bridge of skin on the top side of our penises left over from our circumcisions, and dirt would collect under it. About once a month after our weekly baths our mother would take us one by one and tweeze out the 1/16th of an inch of dirt that had accumulated there. She did that until we were old enough to do it ourselves at 8 or 9.
I played with myself at an early age, but I was more focused on my anus than my penis and pushed crayons into my rectum more than once because I liked the feeling. I was very shy growing up and was extremely thin. I had no muscles at all and when I graduated from high school; I was 6 feet tall and weighed 120 pounds. I had friends in the neighborhood and one good friend at school, but I had been pretty much a loner all my life. I was a frequent target of bullies in grade school and junior high school because I was so skinny and was beaten up many times on the way home from school.
Junior high was a shock! We had to take showers after gym class. While most of us hadn't reached puberty in the 7th grade, there were a few boys who were fully developed and had long penises, hanging testicles, and pubic hair. I was totally unprepared for this and never for a minute thought that I would become like them.
I started to develop at age 13 and didn't know what to make of it when my penis suddenly stood up. About this time we were required to wear jockstraps in gym, and I loved the way it molded itself to my genitals. When I brought my gym clothes home to be washed on Friday, I would wear the supporter under my underwear all weekend.
"Wet dreams" became a regular feature of my life, and the dream part was usually about being naked in public and/or having to urinate. They came once or twice a month, and I didn't have a clue as to what was happening or why. I thought I was wetting my pants at night. I continued to be abused by bullies, especially in gym class, because the only athletic thing about me was my supporter! Once a smaller guy came up to me and without cause or warning, planted his knee squarely in my groin. I was writhing on the floor for at least 10 minutes in agony. His comment was: "At least you have a pair of balls!" I spent the 3 years of junior high just trying to survive. We had a class in sex education, but "wet dreams" and masturbation were never mentioned. It seems likely that most of my male classmates were masturbating, but I was totally unaware of the process and didn't know what they were talking about when they teasingly said to each other "What are you doing after school?" I knew you had sex with a woman by putting your erect penis in her vagina, and that's how babies were made, but I didn't know you could have similar pleasure with your hand or a pillow.
A new family moved in next door with two young boys. Even though they were 5 and 6 years younger than me, I began playing with them. The older boy kept talking about his "Johnny," and I didn't know what he meant, since we were taught at an early age to use correct terminology for everything. Eventually he told me it was what he took a leak with. I asked him if I could see it, and we went into a tent and he took it out. Surprise! He seemed to be neither cut nor uncut! He had a very short foreskin that only partially covered his glans. A month later I asked if I could see it again. We went to my room and he pulled down his pants. I wanted to examine his foreskin, but he wouldn't let me. Instead, he said I could feel his "round things" (testicles). That didn't interest me, so he pulled up his pants and asked to see my "Johnny." I was afraid I would be whipped if anyone found out, and I was uneasy, since I was already developed and he was not. When he insisted, I let him feel me by putting his hand in my pocket, which had a convenient hole in it. My erection was immediate, and he said, "You are so big and hairy down there."
I moved on to high school and suddenly had a growth spurt, which put me up to 6 feet and made me one of the tallest (but still skinniest) in my class. I was no longer tormented by my classmates. I continued to play with myself, but I didn't know any techniques to bring on an orgasm, and I didn't have any close friends who might have shown me how to do it. I loved tight clothing and was very disappointed when my mother wouldn't let any of us buy Levis like all the other boys wore.
My "wet dreams" continued, and my older brothers didn't offer any enlightenment — I'm sure they were afraid of my mother's wrath if they showed me how to masturbate. Most of the time they ignored me anyway, because I wasn't good at sports. Strangely enough, my mother became concerned because I was still having "wet dreams" in high school and obviously not masturbating. Her solution was to place an old sex-instruction manual of hers in my room. I found it, but it wasn't much help, because it had been written in 1904! The illustrations were all of uncut penises, which served to confuse me even more, since nearly all of my classmates were circumcised. It talked about masturbation in a negative way and didn't tell how it was done. It did stress personal hygiene and keeping the penis clean by washing it with soap and water every day, and I started to do that whenever I took a bath.
When I was a senior I decided to do something daring. I went downtown to a sports store and bought a plastic cup to wear inside my jockstrap. I'm sure they wondered what a skinny, non-athletic kid like me wanted a cup for. One day when I was tanning in the backyard, the two boys from next door came over to talk. I was wearing my cup and tight swimming trunks. The bulge was very noticeable, and the younger boy got an erection. I thought it was funny that he was reacting to a piece of plastic!
In the fall of my freshman year at college, I was washing my penis in the bathtub at home and ejaculated. I knew at once what had happened. Up until then I had thought an ejaculation consisted of the drops of Cowper's-gland fluid ("pre-cum") that appeared at the tip of my penis. I made sure the semen went down the drain and went to bed feeling glorious. The next day I mixed up a solution of soapy water and masturbated. I ended up using that every night. I couldn't believe how good it felt, and I knew I had a lot of lost years to make up. But soapy water didn't agree with my skin, so I soon switched to baby oil. I never felt guilty about masturbating, and I never tried to stop!
About a year later, I went upstairs to my room after dark, and when I looked out the hall window, I could see into the neighbor boys' room. There was my friend lying in bed playing with his penis. I quickly turned out the light and moved closer to the window. He would bring himself close to an orgasm, then stand up, pull up his briefs, and start doing exercises. He would do that for 5 minutes or so until the urge subsided a little, and then he'd get back in bed and go at it again. It was only the second time I had seen someone else's erect penis. I watched whenever I could from then on, and it really made me horny. I never did see him ejaculate, because he would always do it on his side with his back toward my window, but it was a very erotic experience for me. I watched him off and on for about 3 months, but when winter came and his windows were closed, he pulled down the shade. My peep-show days were over.
The next summer, his younger brother was in a car accident. He went through the windshield and lost the sight in one eye as well as broke both arms. My only thought was, "He's really going to be horny by the time he gets the casts off!" It never occurred to me to offer to masturbate him, and I've often thought about that and wondered what he would have said had I offered.
I went into the army when I was 25 and wondered how I could continue practicing my favorite hobby in a barracks full of homophobic, horny young men. The problem was solved for me when the physical demands of basic training gave me a severe case of piles. The army's solution was for me to go to the base hospital and sit in a bathtub of hot water twice a week. That meant a private session with Mr. Penis twice a week, and I was in heaven.
I've never masturbated with another guy or in the presence of another guy, and it seems unlikely that I ever will. It probably wouldn't be a bad experience, though, because another guy would know how to do it and could probably teach me new ways. Fellatio is something else I'd like to try once, just to see what it feels like.
I got married when I got out of the army but continued to masturbate to supplement sex with my wife. She didn't approve of it, however, because it made her feel inadequate, so I had to do it secretly. About 10 years ago my wife became disabled, and sex with her is no longer feasible. But I still have my faithful right hand and continue to masturbate 3 or 4 times a week.
The only time I've masturbated in public was when I was in the army. I was incredibly horny one Sunday morning and went to a deserted baseball field on base. I was alone in the bleachers and took my time, eventually ejaculating on the seats in front of me. It was exciting, since I could have been caught at any time.
I'd say my only sexual complaint is that I have more pubic hair than I want. I'm always having to trim the excess and shave the lower shaft of my penis. In the summer, I shave my scrotum and love the way my bare testicles feel against my thighs. I've never felt insecure about the size of my penis, which is below average according to JackinWorld surveys. I'm happy with it the way it is (5 inches long, and 5 inches around). I'm also pleased that my parents had me circumcised when I was born. I can't imagine having a foreskin, and I wouldn't want one.
I've always used the thumb-and-index-finger masturbation technique. I usually do it dry, but if I have time I use a lube (usually udder cream). I almost always do it sitting in bed. I never have a mess to clean up, because I always ejaculate into a Kleenex. When I begin, I warm up my testicles with a small plastic bottle filled with hot water. That makes them loose, and I massage them with my left hand while stroking my penis with my right. The main difference I see between now and when I learned at 17 is that the urgency to do it is gone. I'm still horny all the time and love to do it, but the overpowering need is not there.
I often masturbate for hours at night or in the afternoon on weekends, and I enjoy every minute of it. From what I've read, I produce more "pre-cum" than most men. I usually set a goal of 10 or more drops before I allow myself to orgasm. I've tasted it, and it is a lot better than semen.
I suppose I have a fetish about jockstraps and still wear them frequently. It feels great on cold mornings to put on a supporter and slip in an ice-cold plastic cup (I still have the one I bought in high school!) — the feeling when my warm testicles come in contact with the cold plastic is delicious.
I strongly believe in the "use it or lose it" theory and will continue to masturbate until the day I die. Masturbation is our safety valve and a life-long gift of pleasure from God. I figure if He hadn't wanted us to masturbate, he would have made our arms shorter! Thank you JackinWorld for giving legitimacy to man's universal hobby. The best money I ever spent was my JackInsider membership.