Albolene Forever: Comments

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Let me tell you, Albolene is absolutely,by far,the BEST masturbation lube ever! I've been ruined by it ! I've been using it for about a year, and I just can't wait for the next session. What makes it best is it's super slippery, lasts forever, NO ODOR WHATSOEVER (no evidence for us married guys), never dries out, wipes off easy. For we circumcised guys, the lubricated intensity of gliding over the head is uncomparable. Albolene keeps your penis from getting irritatd from friction like in long dry masterbating session, and keeps it soft and moist - which is important with the head to keep it sensitive as possible. A jar lasts forever, really. You gotta try it.

I just tried the well-known recipe for home-made Albolene (10 parts mineral oil, 2 parts paraffin, 1 part petrolatum) and it worked great. Easy to make, and now I've got a lot of "Albolene" at less than 25% of the price (how do they get away with charging so much for such cheap ingredients?).

I made it right in the jar I'll store it in, a 32-oz. mayo jar (cleaned thoroughly first). Use a wide-mouth jar, so you can easily add ingredients and stir. I set the jar in a bath of water in a saucepan on the stove, and proceeded to melt the paraffin over low heat (the water doesn't need to boil, just get hot). Added the petrolatum, stirred till melted, added the mineral oil. At first the mineral oil seemed to cool the mixture down, and I wasn't sure the wax would mix in, but then as everything warmed up it mixed beautifully. Pour it into another container while warm and liquid, or just put the lid on and store!

How to measure ingredients easily? I happen to have a scale that's accurate to a tenth of a gram, but if you don't, here's the deal:

The mineral oil came in a 16 oz. bottle. Use it all.

The paraffin needs to be 3.2 oz., to go with 16 oz. of mineral oil. The box I got (in the grocery store with the canning supplies) is a 16 oz. box, consisting of 4 4-oz. cakes. 3.2 oz. is 4/5 of 4 oz., so get a ruler, measure off 4/5 of one of the cakes, and there's your quantity.

The petrolatum came in a 3.75 jar (you can use Vaseline, but I just got the generic petrolatum at the drug store). You need a little less than half of this (1.6 oz.), and since the proportions don't have to be precise, you can just eyeball it and get it right.

Good luck and happy orgasms!

For those who worried about finding this in stores (i.e., geography), try internet shopping. I've found good/decent prices at, as well as Simply put the brand name (Albolene) into the item search. Once it arrives... slick up, and stroke away...

Albolene is our (solitary) friend. I'm ambidextrous: my right hand, the one I learned with, is my 'dry' hand. My left hand is my 'wet' hand, and Albolene is the most cost-effective lubrication available. If you're made of money, some of those silicone-based lubricants are extremely effective, but Albolene For solo action, there's nothing better.

It took me awhile before I was able to find a jar of albolene at a local Wallgreens store here in the Midwest, but since the purchase I can tell you it is the best lube that I have ever used. I didn'ealize that there was no flavor or I should say taste to it, so that opens a whole new way that I can use it. Maybe I will add a little flavoring and have a marketable new lube. When I first applyed it I thought that it was going to be just like vasoline, but boy was I mistaken.It feels great and the clean up can be done with just a towel or a pair of panties if that happens to be what turns you on. I really don't think that the price is that bad at all since it takes very little to give you a lubrication you will never forget. K Y cost a lot more than Albolene does if you look as the amount it takes to get the job done. It was well worth the effert to keep searching until I fond it. Also if it is found be somebody you can always say it is some of the best handcream that you have ever found for rough hands,especially since there is no smell to it. I keep it handy all the time and no one really knows that I use it for my lube rather than .my favorite masterbation lube.

Abolene is the best there is, and yes, it is available in the Northwest. The nice thing about it is that when used in the anus, fecal material will not adhere to it. Very clean. The only downside seems to be that in a hot water like a bath, it will coat the tub and take a lot of cleanser to get off the surface.

For those concerned about condoms and oil-based lubes such as Albolene, the solution is to use Avanti condoms, made by Durex. These are made of polyurathane, not latex, and are completely oil safe. Note that Trojan Supra is also made of polyurathane; however my experience (two different occasions, with two different packages purchased at different locations) is that they are subject to breakage. Never any problem with Avanti, however.

You can make your own version of albolene using baby oil, Vaseline, and wax-the main ingredients of Albolene! Heat the oil in a double boiler, or put water ina frying pan, then the saucepan in that-- this is important, because the oil can smoke and/or catch fire if you heat it directly on a burner. (to prevent burning the oil), then melt in the wax and the Vaseline. Experiment with proportions, but the main ingredient is the oil. When it cools, it looks solid, but will liquefy at body temperature. It stays slippery without getting gummy like most of the lubes or hand lotions. To wash it off your hands or penis later, use Dawn dish soap, or Dr. Bronner's liquid castile soap.

I use Albolene all the time to masturbate. A little goes a long way so it is very economical. If you wait for the sales in Walgreen's you can get individual jars for about ten dollars. That jar will last you a long time. Also if you really like to masturbate, you can buy it by the case and get each jar for about eight dollars. Now for my favorite masturbate technique. I go to a nude beach in Santa Cruz, CA in a private area surrounded by stones and tree branches. The sand is so warm. I lay a blanket on the sand and then I take my knee and force a shallow depression in the blanket. I take a dry cleaner plastic bag, (when you get your suit dry cleaned) and lay that on top of the depression. You can fill the depression with mineral oil or just cover your penis with Albolene and lay your penis in the puddle of oil. While laying there you can gather some sand under the blanket to form a woman's breasts. Also with your toes you can dig holes in the sand for your feet to fit into so you are laying nice and flat on the warm blanket and sand. I get a good magizine to look at and I masturbate for hours while reading the magizine. It is so much fun.

Albolene 60 years ago was known as THEATRICAL COLD CREAM and is basically just solidified mineral oil. It was great for removing stage make up and then at the age of 16 discovered its other uses. It is also great for giving massages as it stays on the skin and then when you take a shower, you will feel all smooth all over. It's best feature is that that ever you are doing, if you change your mind, it has no taste. I've taken care of a lot of teen age boys and always gave them their own jar of the best masturbation cream in the world, and they all took it when they left. It also opened conversations between us when they realized that I realized that all teenagers masturbate, so they have a ball. And the more they know it's OK to grunt and make vocal noises during and at the point of climax, do they suddenly know how great that realize can be. However it will dissolve a Condom, so don't use it there.